Let Go of Control to Get
What You Want
Releasing attachment: A little known
secret of the greatest teachers
Releasing is an important practice for
successful goal achievement. It has to do with letting go of
attachment to something or someone. How do you know when you’re
attached to a goal? If you find yourself obsessing and worrying
about the goal as opposed to being enthused and enjoying thinking
about it, you’re attached. You’re attached when you believe that
in order to be happy, you must reach this goal. If these signs
appear, then it’s very important for you to practice releasing.
The technique is simple but not easy. You just decide to let go of
your attachment to getting the goal. In other words, you decide
that if for some reason you do not reach this goal, life will go
on and you will still be happy. Believe it or not, this is a very
important part of the process of reaching your dream.
If you’re too attached, worried, obsessed or tense other people
feel it and pull away from you instead of helping. When you’re
enthusiastic, inspired and radiating confidence, other people will
be magnetically attracted to you and will help and support you.
59. Release attachment to control: There are some things in your
life that you can control. All of them have to do with actions you
can take or internal changes you can make inside yourself. You
cannot control other people, events or circumstances. You can make
the best of what you are given as in “When life hands you lemons,
make lemonade” and you can release attachment to making things fit
your model of the world. When you practice this kind of release on
a regular basis, you will find peace and abundance creeping into
60. Forgiveness, another kind of release. Forgiveness actually is a
releasing process that involves letting go of negative feelings
and resentments you’re holding towards other people. When you
forgive others, you are actually helping yourself more than them.
If you are able to let go of holding on to the negative thoughts
and feelings you have about others, you become much lighter and
freer with a lot more energy. Many well-known success teachers
such as Oprah, Tony Robbins and Wayne Dyer mention forgiveness as
an important step in creating abundance and peace in your life.
61. How to handle bad days and good days: Sometimes as you’re
working hard to get to your goals you’ll find that you have really
bad days when you feel like you’re getting nothing done. This is a
time to release your attachment to being extremely productive
every day and just accept what’s happening. You will also find
that some days are just great, it’s also important on these days
to release attachment to all days being like this. We all go
through energy cycles, ups and downs and highs and lows.
62. Release things you don’t need anymore: Go through all of your
excess “stuff” and start getting rid of (releasing) what you
aren’t using or don’t need. This is a technique that will really
open up space in your world for new things. It will also increase
your energy and help you to feel more deserving. Go through every
room in your home including the kitchen and either sell or give
away those things that may be secretly draining your energy every
63. Open your mind to alternative strategies for reaching your
goals: By learning to accept feedback and constructive criticism,
you will be able to expand your thinking and become much more
creative. Often what holds people back are “control patterns or
ego attachments” where a person thinks, “Their way is the only
way”. There may be many ways to get to the same goal and some of
them might be faster or more efficient than others.
particular strategy may have worked well in the past but with
changing conditions, this may no longer be true. If you can only
open your mind to one way of doing something, you limit your
progress. Make a point of accepting help and ideas from others in
rethinking goals strategies. Don’t be attached to being right.
64. Great stress release technique: Here’s a great technique to
help you instantly release stress and resistance. Imagine yourself
breathing in harmony and relaxation, and then when you breathe out
let go of stress and negativity. Do this for about 5 or 10
minutes. This simple process can be surprisingly useful for
putting you into a relaxed and clear state in just a few minutes
so that you’ll be more effective in working on your goals.
65. Love your goal but release attachment to the form:
great to love your goal and be committed to it, but be willing to
be flexible in the way it shows up. For example, you may want to
earn an additional $5,000 through an investment and instead your
uncle leaves you $5,000 in his will. We never have control over
how the exact outcome of our goals will show up. The releasing
part of reaching a goal is just as important as feeling passion
and energy for it.
66. Some fun ways to release fear:
Draw your fear with colored pens
or crayons or make a play dough model of it. Or scribble with
colored pens or crayons until you feel a sense of release. This
technique may sound simplistic or silly but it is a really good
way to release fear. Both authors have used it and found it to be
tremendously effective. If you find yourself resisting using these
techniques or you find that your fear leads to panic or is
chronic, you probably need professional help.
67. Gratitude for what you have:
This may be one of the most
important tips in this entire report. Being grateful for what you
have allows you to focus on the positive elements in your life,
value the gifts you’ve already been given and appreciate the
fruits of your goal setting efforts. When you’re having a rough
period where you’re starting to judge yourself negatively,
gratitude can break that pattern by shifting your focus to the
positive things in your life.
Continue to 77 Goal Setting Tips 68-71 Persistence and Patience